I shall blog since this is the last day of the month. ‘Life is full of ups and downs’ this really sums up the whole month.
I got back my results, although it was not as good as others, but it I smy own personal achievement. I am quite glad about my results, because it shows that my hard work has paid off.
I am thankful for that fact that I have met him, because he has really spurred me on. He has constantly encouraged me to study harder, get better grades. But I am quite sorry that I did not do the same to him. I was not a good motivator to him. However, I am glad that the both of us are able to set our priorities right. If we can overcome this hurdle, I think we can overcome even more in the future.
I look forward to it
If it is meant to be, it is meant to be.
If it is meant to be, it is meant to be.Hi!
Yesterday my sister was home super early; it is so surprising because she always comes home at about 9 to 10pm. She was telling my about her plans to continue her studies, she is planning to do a medical course.
Well considering the fact that I might be going to university next year and she wants to continue her studies, means that I have to work even harder to get into the course of my choice and try to support myself when I am studying university because having two daughters studying university at the same time would be a huge load on my parents.
The last time I told him about my sister’s plan, he commented my sister was selfish. I do have that impression for quite some time, than I grew out of it. Because it is just my sister, I know that she likes to study, haha and I do not, so might as well give the chance the the more ‘studious’ one. My sister and I compliment each other! Haha
I guess my friends are have nothing much to talk about recently that they have all become very concerned about me and him all of a suddenly. They keep asking how the progress is, and I always say what progress. Somehow they were so engross in talking about it that my friend thought of one incident when she walked past him, and said hi to him but he did not answer back and from there she concluded that we quarrelled.
I was like ‘ huh’ just because he did not say hi to you, you simply assumed that we quarrelled? What interesting thinking my friends have. From then on they keep saying that we should not give up this chance, blah blah blah. How do we even quarrel when we do not even talk to each other in the first place?
Now when I see him I feel awkward. I do not know why. Today in the canteen, he was sitting a few tables away and I did not notice him sitting there but my friend did. He was sitting with a girl, and my friend reaction was super funny. She banged that table and said what is going on when she saw him sitting with a girl. I was shocked because I did not know what she was talking about at first. I turn and looked and saw him. It was quite embarrassing though because he was sitting with his friend’s girlfriend and his friend happened to walk past us at the point of time when my friend banged that table. I think his friend walked back to tell him about it or something because they were looking at us after that (according to my friend). I did not look back, and I was still laughing because of my friend’s reaction.
Later on we saw his friends at the library, why am I so unlucky for the whole day..
After that when me and my friends were fooling about, we saw him again. I was in the quite high mode and I saw him looking at me so I waved to him. He smiled a little, then my friend was like, why did you wave to him like that? He did not even wave back. Haha I think my friends are overly concerned about what is going on between the both of us.
I think for now, my aim would be to get good results and be like was I was previously. Matters of the heart, I shall just leave it up to fate. If it is meant to be, it is meant to be. Haha
lalalala
If it is meant to be, it is meant to be.
If it is meant to be, it is meant to be.Hi!
Yesterday my sister was home super early; it is so surprising because she always comes home at about 9 to 10pm. She was telling my about her plans to continue her studies, she is planning to do a medical course.
Well considering the fact that I might be going to university next year and she wants to continue her studies, means that I have to work even harder to get into the course of my choice and try to support myself when I am studying university because having two daughters studying university at the same time would be a huge load on my parents.
The last time I told him about my sister’s plan, he commented my sister was selfish. I do have that impression for quite some time, than I grew out of it. Because it is just my sister, I know that she likes to study, haha and I do not, so might as well give the chance the the more ‘studious’ one. My sister and I compliment each other! Haha
I guess my friends are have nothing much to talk about recently that they have all become very concerned about me and him all of a suddenly. They keep asking how the progress is, and I always say what progress. Somehow they were so engross in talking about it that my friend thought of one incident when she walked past him, and said hi to him but he did not answer back and from there she concluded that we quarrelled.
I was like ‘ huh’ just because he did not say hi to you, you simply assumed that we quarrelled? What interesting thinking my friends have. From then on they keep saying that we should not give up this chance, blah blah blah. How do we even quarrel when we do not even talk to each other in the first place?
Now when I see him I feel awkward. I do not know why. Today in the canteen, he was sitting a few tables away and I did not notice him sitting there but my friend did. He was sitting with a girl, and my friend reaction was super funny. She banged that table and said what is going on when she saw him sitting with a girl. I was shocked because I did not know what she was talking about at first. I turn and looked and saw him. It was quite embarrassing though because he was sitting with his friend’s girlfriend and his friend happened to walk past us at the point of time when my friend banged that table. I think his friend walked back to tell him about it or something because they were looking at us after that (according to my friend). I did not look back, and I was still laughing because of my friend’s reaction.
Later on we saw his friends at the library, why am I so unlucky for the whole day..
After that when me and my friends were fooling about, we saw him again. I was in the quite high mode and I saw him looking at me so I waved to him. He smiled a little, then my friend was like, why did you wave to him like that? He did not even wave back. Haha I think my friends are overly concerned about what is going on between the both of us.
I think for now, my aim would be to get good results and be like was I was previously. Matters of the heart, I shall just leave it up to fate. If it is meant to be, it is meant to be. Haha
lalalala
This it a super random post with lots of bad language.
I was so slacking the whole weekend!
Haha but it was an interesting weekend though. On Saturday, I went to join this ‘treasure hunt’ organised by the Singapore Heritage Board called Fun on Foot. Haha It was quite fun, we were given this map, a very very rough sketch of the area Jalan Besar and Blastier. It was totally inaccurate. Haha anyway we had to walk around these two areas to answer questions and play games to complete the course. The game started off at about 9am and we ended at about 2pm, we did not complete the course in the end. I cannot believe I walked for about 6 hours!
I guess this trip was really enriching, I have realised the importance of trees! Haha it as really really very hot at jalan besar!
Start of irritating stuffs
Anyway, I have something I want to complain. Haha if I do not write it down I will feel super irk by it. It is anout one of my team mate during the trip. I guess not everyone walked a lot per day and not everyone’s stamina is the same so it is only right that we show some consideration for our team-mates. I am very irked by the fact that she is only insistent on moving on without caring for her fellow team mates. She just keep walking and walking and expects us to fellow up, in the end one of my friend was feeling sick, she wasn’t very keen on the idea of stopping, so in the end we had to split in to two groups for a while, and I had to bring my friend to grab something to eat so that she does not faint on the way. I mean this is a group thing, we should move as a group.
I was also very offended by a few things she said. Tell me who does not sweat after a long long walk? I am those kind that sweat more on my arms, so when she brushed past me she asked why are you so sticky? Who would not? After a 6 hours walk. Then she said her arms are not sticky, I was like ‘okay, I guess you do not sweat on your arms then’. After a while she called me sticky girl. I was so offended and she was laughing, I really wanted to rebuke that ‘it is because you do not sweat on your arms that why it is so thick!’ but I know that was super mean so I did not said it in the end, instead I just ignored her; some things are just not worth it. I am just going to keep my distance from her.
End of the irritating stuffs.
Anyway the whole thing ended at about 3 something and I went to Chinatown with one of my teammate to get stuff she wanted to make for her boyfriend. Haha so sweet!
After that I met another one of my friend at bugis. The aim was to treat him to dinner because I owe him a favour. When I told my friend that I was going to meet the guy for dinner they were like ‘ what about him?’. So I thought I should ask him out too, but in the end he did not come because he had tuition. He suggested next Friday, but I reminded him that he had cca stuffs to do and said forget about it.
Actually I feel that I kind of give up, if he wants it, he will do it. I actually feel quite numb about him already. I cannot bring myself to be very understanding, maybe all I can do now is to stop myself from ignoring him totally, because I was taking forever to reply to his message and do not feel like replying him. My message was very short and monotone.
Anyway by the time I met my guy friend, I was super tired. Hehe but he was updating me on stuffs, so it kept me quite awake for quite some times. It is interesting to hear him talk about how he is trying to woo the girl, haa and the things he encounters. I hope they get together soon, because it would be far more interesting to see them together!
Anyway that girl was at suntec too at that time, so I suggested that he should send her home! But he did not want to haha, I am like creating opportunity for him! haha.
i guess i will just end here, this post is truly very random.
我為舍要做這种事， 我很想舍么都不想就招樣簡簡單單的過著我自己的生活。
看著你我心裏有一種喜悅， 不知道你到底明白嗎
開始終是快樂的， 無憂無律的談天說地，甜蜜的感覺把我們都寵坏了。
從沒想過我們到低經得起打擊，經得起時間的無情嗎， 我們就這么無裏頭的跳進了。
現在想起從前的誠諾， 感覺上好像當時的我們好幼智， 好無知， 就這樣認為我們舍么風雨都經得起， 舍么荊棘都低擋不了我們。
我在想現在我們到低能不能經得起這考验。
Seriously I am getting sick of it. I feel so tired and I feel like giving it up totally. It is taking up to much ton on me and I think he does not even know it...
Oh man, I do not even know how long I have left till prelims. Everything is happening at such a fast pace. Why!!
Now, they have come up with some school leaving certificate, that will consist of our A level results and our testimonial. I am fine with that.. but the bad thing is we are suppose to write! We are suppose to write about our achievement and our qualities. Oh my.. I am such a modest person, how can they ask me to self praise.
Argh! I can’t think of anything to write. I don’t wish to write. However in order to get into SMU a strong record is needed, so I guess I would have put in my best effort in writing the stupid report. I rather they ask me to write a reflection and they draw inference from there.
I guess it is natural to feel a bit affected right?
tired.. what should i feel?
tired.. what should i feel?I do not know what I should feel right now, would there ever be a correct feeling for what I am feeling right now? I feel so tired…
Just as I felt that things were getting better, it might not be as good as what I think. We have got back all out results, and I scored fairly well in my opinion as I have improved a lot. I manage to pass all my subjects and my most satisfying subject is math! I passed. I feel so happy, I feel like putting a big grin on my face and tell everyone that I have done well. I really put in effort for this exam, so I really hoped to do well and I did, so I am proud of myself.
But sometimes, we just have to be sensitive to the others. My friend, one in particular did not do well, so she was quite upset, and she was saying that she should not get this kind of results. One things I felt fed up was that she did not even study for the exam, she spend the whole holiday going on holiday or going out, she did not ven have CCA commitments so when she said that she did not deserved to get this kind of result really makes people wonder a bit. But I guess, she knows that it is because she never studies so she is really putting in great effort now! Yay! Go go!
Another thing that makes me not being able to feel so happy about my results would be him. He did not fare as well as he expected and he was really really disappointed over his results. I really know what to do, I did not know how to console him. Sometimes I feel that he makes me feel so helpless in front of him, there are so many times when I see him sad or disappointed over things and no matter what I say would not improve things. It renders me very helpless and frustrated.
So I guess he is also very anxious over the poor results he obtained. I know I should understand, I tried. I stopped bugging him online, I do not message him unnecessarily, I try to understand tutorials better so that I can answer any questions if he does not know. But I guess, just trying is not enough. I cannot understand tutorials fast, I need lots of proseeing time, so I guess I did not help him much afterall.
Finally I guess the both of us came to a common decision, because we thought that waiting for each other after school was a waste of time so we thought that we shloud just go home on our own and concentrate on our studies for these few months. I am not sure if we are doing that correct thing, it might caused us to drift apart after all we do not really see each other in school. I guess it is really up to fate now.. but somehow I can’t seem to shake oft this sad and down feeling I am having. But this must not affect my studies, or else it would defeat the purpose of everything.
World cup is over and everything is back to normal… the school’s teacher got the shock of their lives when they gave us back our results, not us who got the shock of our life. Every single subject, without fail (maybe with exception from general paper)mention about world cup. They all said ‘ the world cup is now over, please study hard’
I guess they all blame the world cup fever for the super poor results. But seriously, I think with or without world cup, our results would still be horrendous. The papers are so difficult! But I am quite happy for this test, I managed to scrap a pass for all. I got all the grades from B to E, such a nice set of result. Why is the A missing! It is okay, quoting my friend’s phase “I am only going to tolerate As and Bs for prelims!” haha
I am sleepy. Going to sleep now.
the football feverHmm, yesterday as expected Germany won, I was hoping for some unexpected results. At one part of the game there was many fouls and my friend shown me and interesting article.
http://fifaworldcup.yahoo.com/06/en/060708/1/8njs.html
it says that The match for third place has a habit of producing plenty of goals. Haha quite true, and other than that I think they have produced quite a lot of fouls too, some very anticlimax foul. Like the German scorer was given a yellow card for taking off his clothes.
Haha, I though Portugal was not going to score any already, but just when I was about to switch off the television, they scored!! Yay! But was so happy, at least the managed to score one goal! But there wasn;t much cheering at the stadium, so sad, his team mates did not even congratulate him.. I wished that the team spirit was higher.
Eventually I watch the whole game, in hope that Portugal will score another goal, hee hee but they did not.
I will stay up for tonight’s game! I would. After all it is once every four years, I will just sleep super early tonight and wake up super early tomorrow morning! Haha. Go go france!
sleep wanted
sleep wantedI have still awake at this unruly hour, one of the reason could be I am catching a flight, but that is impossible now and the other would be I am watching football!
Why do they have to start soo late, I was sleeping when the match started half a sleep in the last 15 minutes of the first round and typing this in the half time….
I am sleepy! But I still want to watch. haha
Today we had a career guidance talk in school, so we were released at 1045. I guess this week is not much of a study week, more of getting us back in school week. Tomorrow I will be having the polling day holiday, so I will not be going to school.
Just some random thoughts…
Now, the school atmosphere seems to be in the love-y dorky mode. All the couples seem to pop out randomly all over the place! I guess it is because everyone knows that the school year is ending soon, so is our life in JC so it is now or never. Haha.
I guess getting into a relationship now might have great impact; sometimes it is good, sometimes it is bad. It depends on how they handle it.
I suppose after I met him, I feel the need to study harder and get better grades. One of the main reasons is that he has good grades too, thus I do not want to lose to him. The other is a bit more stupid, it is because I do not want his friends to think that I am just another girl who smiles at everyone, but I am smart too! Haha.
Sometimes it is very daunting because after studying so much, you still do not get good grade, it is simply frustrating. I have yet to get back any of my test, but I got this feeling that I did not do so well. I am not sure if I will cry if I do not do well this time, after all I put in so much effort. If I really cry, this will be the first time I am crying for my results, but I decided I will not cry, no matter how disappointed I am. I will continue to work hard! At least I know this time, I have no regrets and it felt somewhat satisfying to actually try so hard.
I felt that I have changed a bit after I got to know him; I am not so nonchalant about everything anymore. Whenever I think of the fact that he tries even harder makes me want to try a bit harder to complement him.
Haha, maybe I really like him more and more.
funny and confusing puppy love affair?? ( that sounds so wrong...)Saturday
Haha, after the BBQ I was too tired to go anywhere, so I rejected all the invitations to go out! Hee. My friends were saying that I am so lazy.
Sunday
We went out on together to the airport. Haha I was quite surprised when he asked me out, but I did not ask anything. Then he asked me do I know why he ask me out, I was like, really have reason ar. Haha he said that it is because the teacher ever mentioned that term 3 will be very fast and hectic, so he is worried that we might not have time to go out in future, so he might as well make use of this holiday to go out. Haha I was thinking ‘ wow, I never thought of that, that is like the so distant future’ i know I know, I am not the kind to plan ahead, I take things as they come.
Anyway, we when to the airport, I am not sure why. We were just walking around randomly and complaining the lack of things to do in the airport. Hee hee. Finally we went to eat at fish and co. hhaa, I go this feeling that he thinks that I do not like to spend money a lot, hee.
Anyway, we eat and talk and walk some more, finally we decided there is nothing for us to do at the airport, there wasn’t even any aero planes flying off! So we took a mrt back..
On the mrt we talk, I got this feeling that we talk too much? Haha.
Anyway, I do not know how did we get to the topic, ooo, I remember now, he was saying he is quite bored, and so I said ask his friends to go out, but he said that his friends are too busy mugging. So I said other class people? Then he somehow said that this girl ; his ex I think, asked him out, so I said then why don’t go, since you are bored. He say ‘ alone leh! Later you angry ar’
I know I am slow to this kind of situation, can’t blame me right. Yup, then I said that it is fine, cause I go out with guys alone too cause we are friends. But I do not know what he said, forgot. Then I ask him, does that girl still like him, cause after all she does a lot of things for him, much much more then me, I admit. She spends time organizing his birthday, buying present, and even messaging him constantly… I am even beginning to wonder, why did she initiated the breakup in the first place… anyway, I guess he was kind of wait for my reaction, but as usual the slow me,.. he said that girl hinted, but he said they should remain as just friends, and as usual the slow me just said ‘ o ok’
After we left each other, I suddenly though that that girl is so much better then me to him, I was kind of pondering when I was super bored at night, and he was online but packing his room.. I think it is very messy, cause from what I heard. Haha but dun expect me to pack, haha cuz mine room is messy too. He hinted that I should pack my house, because that time I said that I will invite him to my house when I start packing it.
Anyway, my thought as like, I rather that he consider carefully about that girl without thinking that I will be angry.. I really do not want us to be together out of obligations or what so ever. But I thought that saying this to him is so so so sleezy, dunno, I was thinking of it seriously one moment and Ifelt so tickilish the next moment, I cannot imagine myself saying that to him. I mentioned that I was thinking of something to him, then I thinks he know it is about the girl, he ask me not to think too much and not to worry.
I am not worrying, am i? haha but in the end I can’t bring myself to say it, not say; type it. So I said it is not a bad thing, shall tell him about it other days. I think maybe tomorrow, when I do not feel so weird saying it, I hope.
so long.. farewell
so long.. farewell..Finally the mids are over! I have being enjoying my weekends thoroughly. Hee hee
Let’s start on Friday.
The first day of my holiday! The J1s organized a farewell party for us. One thing I found ironic is that, since it is my farewell party, I do not have to help in anyway right? Haha but in the end, I had to inform everyone about the farewell party and confirm who was not coming. It is okay I guess after all take it as my last duty! Yesh!
We were suppose to meet at 5pm at east coast, but a few others, including myself, decided to go earlier to cycle and he asked me out to have lunch before going. So in the end, we (me and him) decided to meet at 1.30pm. haha, I thought I was going to be so late when I left the house at 1pm, but luckily I wasn’t, instead he was late. He only arrived like 20minutes later, because he overslept. Haha lousy! But whatever, at least he contacted me to inform me that he was going to be late, better then letting me sit there like and idiot, and sending me sorry message every 5 minutes which I found it quite amusing.
After having lunch, we were suppose to meet our friends, but apparently I got the location wrong ( blur me) so they asked us to get on at the bus stop, they called us when they where approaching and at the bus stop they called us too and I was super positive that we were at the correct bus stop! Here comes the creepy part, when we had boarded the bus, there wasn’t a single person; aside from the bus driver. I almost freak out! Haha but turned out that there were 2 buses, so eventually we took a different bus. The bus ride was super duper long, the both of us entertained ourselves by constantly looking at the map, and commenting on the houses, blah blah blah…
Finally we reached East Coast Park! The bus ride was loooong, and so is the walking distance. We rented a bike, and then we (me and him) were wondering is it our leg, our bikes or we have not sports cell, the other two cycled so fast! Haha like super fast, then the both of us was like ‘what wrong with them’ haha but we know that they did it on purpose, it is so obvious. Anyway to add: they do not know anything, they think that he is ‘wooing’ me. Haha, so we said let them go and tire themselves out. I know we are evil.
Finally it is time for the BBQ, I did not got to eat much anyway, all the things I ate was either too cooked (burnt) or uncooked. According to the science students logic(no offence here), if it is burnt, it is good. It prevents diarrhea, because there is charcoal or something. To me, burnt is burnt and it is not nice, after all it is cancer causing isn’t it?
Throughout the whole BBQ they were relentlessly teasing the both of us, and I begin to wonder, don’t they get sick of it? After all, I have developed immunity against it! =). Then, I joined the j1s exco for a great gossip session! Oh man, there is so many scandalous things going on between the J1s, it is so exciting. Haha, this year’s J1s are sure interesting people, too bad we are leaving soon.
Haha, in the end, the J1s gave us each a notebook, writing their thoughts and wishes for us, so sweet of them. We did not even do so much for the senior last year (feeling a bit guilty). Yup they are a cheery and passionate bunch of juniors, although there are some conflicts between some of them, but I know they can work it out! I believe that they will get along just fine in the end. Go juniors!
