GIVE THE DAY A BIG SMILE!!!

feeling down

i think i am in the down mood again. i have just got back my general paper today, and the results is... i do not know what to do anymore, i feel that i am at my wits end. today when my friend got back her results, she cried. i fared worse then her, i felt very numb than, although i expected bad results. my friend asked me why didn't i cry and still seemed so happy, seriously i do not know and i just kept on smiling, i did not knoe what else to do except to smile.

sometimes i feel that it is very difficult for me to express my feelings openly. i could not show my friends anything else aside from my ' happy side'. this group of friends i have in junior college feels so.. superfacial. i just felt that i couldn't afford to share these things with them. they are different from those i had in secondary school and even at my workplace. those people seems more.. real. i just got the feeling that they would not turn their back on you and that we can really just lean on each other without worries.

however when i am with this group of friend in junior college, i just got this gut feeling that we are together for the sake of being together. it is just like not one wants to be alone thus we stick together, there is not strong feelings stuck. it just feels like we are using each other. the feeling of using each other is just so wrong.

treating each other with great dignity, respect and trust is the most important thing that a person we must nevef forget. when we treat a person these, we would too recieve it back, by then you would feel that it is the happiest thing that could ever happen. the bond between this two person would be unbelieveable and ever lasting. if you have treat the person with dignity, respect adn trust but you did not reieve the same thing back in return don't be discouraged, just feel pity for these people because they all lossing out in a big part of their lives.if they ever come to their sense it would be good and they would find themselves however if they contiues their lives the way it is, they woudl find themselves a very lonely person in future.

i would never want to forget this most important factor in a person's life. much as i do not want to loss it, i have unknowingly dropped some on my course of life and i hope i would find it back because it is as importatn as life itself. i hope soon i would be able to go back to my old days when i cry as i want, smile out with pure happiness and have fun with the people around me.. till then..

posted by maevbe @ 5:24 PM